She's the type of girl

She is the type of girl you see laughing all the time, she is the type of girl everyone turn for an advice to, she is the type of girl who always let her two friends to walk in front and walk alone behind them whenever there's a narrow lane, she is the type of girl who always be the second guess, she is the type of girl who loves making her friends laugh and happy, she is the type of girl who smiles bitterly when her friends call her fat and ugly, she is the type of girl who laugh at the jokes which offend her, she is the type of girl who seems to be okay when people jokes about the thing that she has been insecure of, she is the type of girl who would rather push herself in front of the other, she is the type of girl who is not that significant, she is the type of girl that boys would never find attractive, she is the type of girl who looks good in the pictures, she is the type of girl who think she is strong, she is the type of girl who blogs about what's actually happen, she is the type of girl who hides,

SHE IS THE TYPE OF GIRL I AM.

Sometimes, I distance myself from people because I can either feel them forgetting me or not wanting me anymore. If they notice, I know I meant something but if not, I know where I stand. Though the results are always the same, I find myself more than a billion times on a position to be let down for.

and to those people who only realize that I exist when you need me,

FUCK YOU.

I'm not being selfish,

it just,

before when I was there for you,

I thought you would be here for me too.

I was wrong.

This is on my desktop background. 

Just to remind me every day that I don't breathe to server others. 

That if I live on trying to please everyone, I ought not to call it mine.